A Dish Best Served Cold

"For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbours, and laugh at them in our turn?'' - from Jane Austen's Pride and Predjudice

I recently heard of a couple, having just adopted a child, who were asked, "Did you not want any children of your own?" Now I could dissect that statement and point out the at least four things wrong with it, but I imagine you can do that yourself.  Conversations like that make my stomach sink or make me squirm in discomfort.   I am left shaking my head and blinking my eyes in disbelief.

Then there are the times that render me speechless.  Like the time a well-meaning individual told me that the reason Matt has spina bifida is because his mother stood in front of the microwave while she was pregnant. I stood staring at her and not saying anything.  I considered quoting random Bible verses just to avoid saying the wrong thing.

Instead, I told her the truth.  No one knows what causes spina bifida.  And I hope I said it politely.

But in the meantime, I've started a folder labled: things to include in my book.  The person who insulted my hair went in that folder.  So did the person who suggested that I don't do enough laundry (no, not Matt).  When friends tell me things that have been said to them that I think are funny or inappropriate, those anecdotes go in the file.

This book is practically writing itself! (No, it is not.)

I will never forget the time my sister e-mailed me a link to a blog post.  The subject line was, "She wrote about you, Elizabeth!"  I pulled it up, and there it was on the world wide web: a story about me acting less than my best.  The author didn't mention me by name, but I knew the incident and recognized myself.  Now it is my turn.

Like revenge, French silk pie is a dish best served cold.  The recipe comes from my super talented sister Rebekah.  If you don't want to know what is in French silk pie, stop reading now.  These ingredients can not be unseen.  If, like me, you can use the two hours of chilling time to systematically forget and convince yourself that it is only 50 calories in a generous slice (and chock full of fiber), then keep reading.  Also, it uses raw eggs (I use farm eggs), so if that makes you squeamish, you might want to use this recipe.

Confession: right after taking these pictures, I dropped the pie plate.  At my feet was my favorite pie dish in five hundred shards stuck in a pile of whipped cream and chocolate.  I cried.  I think I will add this to my idea folder.

French Silk Pie

Make pie crust. Rebekah uses chocolate teddy grahams: make into crumbs, add some melted butter (about 1/4 cup) and line pie pan, bake until it puffs up a bit (5-7 minutes). I use  a pastry crust, but you can also use a pre-made chocolate crust or a shortbread crust.
Filling:

3 oz. unsweeted chocolate, melted and cooled to room temperature

2 sticks softened butter (obviously, no substitutes)

3/4-1 cup sugar (I usually use a scant cup)

1 tablespoon vanilla

4 eggs (use pasteurized eggs, if you must, but don't use egg substitute as it won't work)

Beat butter on medium speed, gradually beat in sugar. Add chocolate and vanilla. Continue beating. Add eggs, one at a time, beating for 1 to 2 minutes between eggs (at about 2 eggs is when the filling finally starts looking satiny). Keep beating. When the mixture looks the way you want it to ("light and fluffy"), pour it into the cooled pie crust and refrigerate until set (2+ hours).

Garnish with very lightly sweetened whipped cream and chocolate curls, if desired.